Breaking News: Celebrity Divorce Causes Global Uprising

love and power

Photo Credit: Janrito Karamazov via Compfight cc

(UnTangled News)The world was rocked yesterday by a cataclysmic event—a divorce—that will alter the course of humanity and the future of the planet.

Although details of the event are still being sorted out, we can confirm some basic facts:

For millennia, Love has been married to Power, clinging to Power and riding on his coattails, relying on Power to transform people and the world. Love had low self-esteem—she was afraid to exist on her own in the world, afraid of what people would do to her and say about her.

But yesterday, something changed. In hearts and homes and villages and cities and nations, Love finally gave up on the relationship. Love just up and walked out on Power, ending their partnership for good.

One close friend of the couple, who goes by the name of Inertia, was quoted as saying, “They were always at odds with each other. They kept each other in check. While they were together, you got the sense nothing would ever change. And I kind of liked that.” Inertia went on to add, “Now that Love is free of Power, I’m afraid she’s going to change everything.” Inertia refused to comment further, saying he needed to go take his Pepto-Bismol.

Reports from Around the Globe

Reports pouring in from around the globe suggest Inertia’s worst fear may be coming true—now that Love and Power are divorced, Love has been free to sacrifice and to lose and to be vulnerable and to invite and to release and to honor:

An older brother quit beating on his younger brother, picked him up, dusted him off, and offered to be his friend and his mentor.

A father quit screaming at his children—quit demanding obedience and respect—and instead began to whisper, coaxing them into love and respect by honoring their dignity.

A mother relinquished control over her children—she just gave up on perfecting them. She decided to let them be kids, to love them, and to accept whatever judgment comes her way from other parents about her messy children.

A wife quit wielding power through silence and isolation and withdrawal. She crumbled and confessed her broken-terrified heart to her husband.

A husband stopped acting as if sex was his daily right, looked his wife in the eye, and told her he would love her to the end, no matter what their marriage bed looked like.

A standoff over a parking spot dissolved into a friendship when one man freely offered the spot to his competitor and then volunteered to take him to lunch.

Violence, anger, and aggression have decreased precipitously in the last twenty-four hours. Road rage has evaporated, school cliques are dissolving, political debate has quieted to a murmur, churches are talking with each other instead of competing against each other, and the NFL is considering cancelling next season as it explores ways to revamp its game around something besides power and dominance.

Love and Power Hold Press Conferences

Sources close to Love say she is not interested in speaking with the media. Since the divorce, she has become much more quiet and contemplative. Although many are suggesting she will have no strength to bind the world together on her own, she is not interested in defending herself.

Her best friend, Grace, issued a final statement on her behalf: “My good friend Love is thrilled to be free and unfettered again. She is excited to go quietly about her business with little fanfare. She’s eager to spend her days becoming more intimately familiar with the hearts and minds of people everywhere. She’s a little rusty, so at first I’ll be reminding her how to invite people, instead of ordering them around.”

In contrast, Power immediately held a press conference. Reports suggest it was difficult to record his tirade, because the seating chart was incredibly stringent, most reporters couldn’t find their seats, and anyone left standing was thrown out. Those who did remain say Power was essentially incoherent with anger.

Power’s best friend, Shame, apologized on Power’s behalf, admitting, “Power and I have gotten away with some heinous things because, with Love by our side, we could convince people of our benevolence. I guess now we’ll have to find other ways to appear benign.” Then Shame, horrified at its own honesty, turned to reporters, looked them in the eye, and said, “None of you are good enough, either. At your core, each of you is rotten and horrible and depraved. Admit it to yourselves. Embrace what you are. And then join us. We’re about to go on quite a rampage.”

Public Reaction

An official spokesperson for the Government responded calmly to the upheaval, suggesting the story was hearsay and rumors. He stated, “This is ridiculous. Love and Power will never break up. They wouldn’t risk that kind of instability.” Reporters noted, however, that despite his calm demeanor, his eye was twitching and his collar was wet with sweat.

Another government source, speaking on condition of anonymity, stated, “Government is terrified. If Love is free to do her work, then Government won’t be the most valued person in the room. And that makes Government very nervous—it needs to be the most needed thing around.”

Religion was divided over the events. In part because that’s what Religion likes to do—divide itself—but also because it has been such a strong public supporter of Love, while quietly relying on Power to grow its numbers. One ecstatic pastor was heard to say, “We’ve been waiting for Love to come home. Faith and Hope have been missing their sibling.” In contrast, another prominent pastor lamented, “We can’t run our business without Power and his buddy Shame. Love should reconcile with them immediately.”

The recording industry was also abuzz with the news. Kanye West tweeted: “When I rapped ‘Do you have the power to let power go?’ I had no idea I was talking about Love.” Minutes later he issued another tweet: “Then again, I’ve always said I’m a lover, not a fighter.”

Huey Lewis got wind of Kanye’s “prophecy” and immediately took umbrage. He stated, “Man, I’ve been singing about the Power of Love since Marty McFly went back in time. This isn’t news. We’re the News.

Finally, psychologist Kelly Flanagan issued his analysis,When you live with Power long enough, you become ashamed. You just stop trusting in your own goodness and strength. Yesterday, it appears, Love simply quit being ashamed of herself. She got confident, quit clinging to Power, and became fully herself.”

He smiled, “And that’s all we’ve ever needed her to be. I don’t think anything or anyone is beyond her reach now.”


Comments: You can share your thoughts or reactions at the bottom of this post.                

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Disclaimer: This post is not professional advice. It should be read as you would read a “self-help” book. For professional and customized advice, you should seek the services of a counselor, who can become more intimately familiar with your specific situation. Counselors can be located through your insurance network or through your state psychological association.

Kelly is a licensed clinical psychologist and co-founder of Artisan Clinical Associates in Naperville, IL. He is also a writer and blogs regularly about the redemption of our personal, relational, and communal lives. Kelly is married, has three children, and enjoys learning from them how to be a kid again. You can find him on Facebook, Twitter, and Google+.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

50 thoughts on “Breaking News: Celebrity Divorce Causes Global Uprising

  1. I really loved the Reports from Around the Globe with all the examples of Love. Amazing!

  2. Thank you, everyone! I had such a good time writing this post. It was fun to just imagine the ripple effect of this kind of “divorce.” And I think each of us can be ground zero. : )

  3. Imaginative and very thoughtful post. Thank you for divorcing love and power; clearly they just were not right from the start. Gossip said he heard they had “issues”when they were just courting.

  4. I have been thinking about this post for the last two weeks now. It has really made me contemplate how I am parenting my children and what I most want them to remember about me. Thank you. Sometimes we need to take a good hard look at ourselves!!

    • Jamie, You’re welcome; I’m glad to hear it resonated! Honestly, when I post something, it makes me think harder about it, too. I’ve been watching all the ways I use power in my relationships. Awareness is a good thing!

  5. I love the whole concept and analogy of love, power, inertia, etc. etc. Very creative! Where do you get your ideas? I recently subscribed after reading a couple of articles. I learned a lot of it. I’m currently studing BS Psychology in my country and hoping to make my Masters Degree after graduating. Your articles really help me open my horizons to new things. Thank you doc.

    • Trish, thank you. A friend recently sent me a quote, “Originality is just well-disguised plagiarism.” In my case, it’s very true. I do a lot of reading and a lot of wrestling with these ideas in my therapy with clients. And then I say them in my own voice. : )

      Blessings to you in your studies!

  6. Pingback: Breaking News: Love No Longer Exists (And the World is Better Off) | UnTangled
  7. Captivating yet raw. I held my breath as I read about Grace divorcing power & changing her name to love. Then as I read further I breathed out…
    This truly is beautiful to read, to understand…or try to ar least understand.
    There is love in your words, and its wonderful to hear & realise. I never thought I would hav ever got here emotionally… Within myself to recognise love & to recieve openly and. pay it forward. To others whether it be platonically, romanticly or in business
    love is key, or the door as such. tHank you for your articles. The one you wrote from a father to a daughter….also amazing. Real men show emotion and dont hide it, if you have kids I hope they are proud of of u.
    Cheers. J

    • Thanks for your kind words, J. These were fun pieces to write. I’m glad the resonated with you!

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  9. Despair came to visit me, it wasn’t planned and completely unexpected. Whilst we were deeply engaged in an uninspiring conversation there was a knock at the door. Guess who was there, HOPE! OH, what a relief to see HOPE, of course I invited HOPE in and surprise, surprise Despair quickly disappeared. HOPE kindly reminded me that we don’t have to allow despair into our lives, we are never alone and all we need to do is call upon Faith and Belief, they will never let us down. Just like fire and water, Despair can never exist when HOPE, BELIEF & FAITH are with us! True story!!

    • Marjolyn, I love this playful extension of the post. It’s a fun world to inhabit more extensively!

  10. LOVE this! I only have one small problem with it, it’s that Kayne West should not have been quoted as saying he was a lover, not a fighter as that was The King of Pop-Michael Jackson who sang those exact words and in honor of HIS love, should have been quoted on that phrase. Michael wanted to “heal the world”, HE wanted love to shine all over the world long before Kayne West was even heard of!
    I love this entire article! Don’t get me wrong. I’m just saying that we should pay credit and honor where it is due.

    • Ha! Great point, M! Well, I guess Kanye does a lot of sampling in his music, so why not some “sampling” in his fictional tweets, right? : )

  11. Brilliant! I love well written, clever writing. What a refreshing view. Excellent!

    Debbie Takara Shelor
    Bestselling author of Peering Through the Veil: The Step by Step Guide to Meditation and Inner Peace

    • Power IS love, and it is the essential Man power of “the Father”. Your sentiment makes You an exemplary “douchebag”, Sir. There, polite.

      • I’d normally delete these kinds of comments because of the language, but in the spirit of the post, I will refrain from using my power in that way and just say, “Love you, Ron.”

  12. Interesting how love was gendered as female. Obviously would be weird to gender love as male though…. gender neutral tho? patriarchy built into language makes things so difficult 🙁
    also not sure Love could just suddenly conjure up the confidence to immediately divorce Power just like that…. but this isn’t literal? so i’m prolly over thinking it
    Also, interesting that this was all framed in a context of marriage, an institution linked intimately to the all-powerful state

  13. While some may have called it a marriage made in heaven it’s about time they separated! Now Love can finally be free to be all She has the ability to be.

  14. There can be no love without power. How would anyone know how to love if they never experienced power and hate? An unconditionally loving society would end up in an eventual chaos of violence. People who bottle up their naturally hateful emotions end up releasing it all at one cataclysmic and often violent outburst. Instead of suggesting we tolerate and love unconditionally perhaps if people were simply honest and upfront about their feelings we could come to understand and accept one another. It is a fantasy to expect human beings to accept and tolerate each other’s selfish and power driven tendencies. Perhaps if Love wasn’t so selfish and unrealistic in her expectations of Power they could come to appreciate one other. Perhaps Power would no longer feel the need to dominate Love and instead focus on empowering himself for his own and others’ benefit.

  15. Overall, a good post but I wonder about your choice to apply genders to the two sides. ? “Love” is feminine, and “Power” is masculine. ?
    Personally, this ruined the article for me. Sorry.

  16. Brilliant! An article that deserves to be read over and over again until its message is completely absorbed,Thank you Dr. Flanagan!

  17. Speaking of divorce, let’s now talk of marriage. Matthew Fox’s The Hidden Spirituality of Men is an excellent book on the new marriages of Feminine and Masculine divine, and many more unions of togetherness that we’ll see and need for our lives to evolve and grow!

  18. How about:: love is a guy who clings to the false power of his evil over lord. . He can’t handle the true power of the love of a woman of integrity because he is actually afraid of himself. he is afraid to be his true self, real love.

  19. if they were both introduced to the moderation twins we might find a stable transition to world peace

  20. Thank you Dr.Eziza you are a life saver you are the reason why i want to live a thousand years on this earth, Because you brought my lover that was the light of my world back to me just within 48hours. I confess to the whole world that you are great and you are capable of bringing back lost love. Contact Dr.Eziza on or call him on +2348058176289

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